My Self-Liberation Story

MY STORY

I have always hated being told what to do.

For many years, I thought this was just leftover rebellion from my teenage years and early 20s. I traveled a lot, embraced life fully—sometimes recklessly—indulging in drugs, alcohol, late nights, and toxic men. I had so much fun while doing it, but I was also searching for something deeper.

During that time, I started many things only to quit them later, which made me worry about not knowing what I wanted to do with my life. I couldn’t seem to stick to a single path, but looking back, I see it differently. This is the way of the artist, the creative, the wild and sensitive soul. We’re not here to fit into boxes or molds. We’re here to create something new, shaped by the material of our life experiences.

Every time someone—usually my mother—suggested a life path for me, I felt my soul rebel. It was like an untamable rage rising from deep in my belly, scratching at my lungs, and tearing its way out through my throat. The wild woman within me would never settle for a beautiful cage.

So, I kept seeking—often in very dark places. I spent nearly a decade struggling, feeling like I wasn’t good enough. I shrank myself, dimmed my light, and doubted my worth. I let other people lead me into situations and beliefs that left me sick and distressed.

That’s the thing about being highly sensitive: we naturally lack boundaries because we’re wired to absorb and process more than most people. Without boundaries, we carry what isn’t ours, and it weighs us down. Eventually, I reached a point where the pain was too much to numb or deny. Drugs, travel, or relationships weren’t enough to escape it anymore.

It started with back pain and depression, then a global pandemic that forced me to question the life I had been living. Diagnoses like premenstrual dysphoric disorder (PMDD) and chronic burnout gave me some direction, but they didn’t define me. I never believed there was something wrong with me—I just felt like I was missing information.

Through my studies and personal exploration, I began to see how systems of oppression, politics, and societal structures were not designed to empower us. I realized I had to create my own systems to live in a way that was healthy and free.